In every social group, we often find people who are different than the rest. Sometimes, these individuals stand out for a positive reason, such as their good looks or intelligence. Other times, their difference is not so favorable. Being recognized as a narcissist is not a good thing. Yet, it happens all the time and social groups seem to have at least one of these toxic friends.
But, is it possible to identify in advance if your friend has a narcissistic personality disorder? Here are 13 signs to identify a narcissistic friend.
#1 – He always talks about himself
A narcissistic friend will always be the center of attention. He is constantly talking about his life and how he is better than others. It’s not that he doesn’t care about other people’s lives, but he needs to be the center of attention.
#2 – He’s never wrong
Narcissistic people believe they’re perfect, so they tend to blame others for their mistakes or failures instead of accepting responsibility for them. They never admit when they’re wrong because they don’t see anything wrong with themselves — or else they only admit it after being confronted by someone else or when it’s too late to make any difference in the situation.
#3 – When he’s wrong, he blames you
A narcissist will always have an excuse for his behavior. He will blame you if he’s in the wrong, and if you point it out, he’ll think you’re too sensitive or overreacting. The narcissist will also use the fact that you called him out as an excuse to attack you further — because what could be worse than being called out for being a bad friend?
#4 – He takes more than he gives
Narcissists are self-absorbed and use others for their gain. If he’s always asking for favors but never returns the favor, he may be a narcissist.
#5 – He doesn’t recognize boundaries between you and him as friends
If you have a narcissist friend, he won’t respect your boundaries. Instead, he’ll try to invade your privacy and expect you to always be there for him. This is a major sign of narcissistic behavior because narcissists need their needs met above all else — even if it means violating someone else’s boundaries.
#6 – He doesn’t recognize your mistakes
If you make a mistake, he’ll be sure to point it out and use it against you in the future. For example, if you accidentally tell him something that he was not supposed to know and he uses it against you later on, this is a sign of narcissism.
#7 – He ignores your needs and wants
A narcissist will pay attention to the needs of others only when they benefit him or herself. Most narcissists are self-centered and impulsive. If they don’t care about you, then they won’t show up for you, and they won’t be there when you need them.
#8 – He’s quick to get angry
Narcissists are often hot-tempered and easily angered by the smallest things in life. When something doesn’t go their way, they can become very angry and lash out at everyone around them. They also tend to be threatening when someone tells them something they don’t want to hear, so it’s best not to cross them when you know they’re having a bad day!
#9 – He chooses you to be with him because of what he can get from that friendship, not because of who you are
Narcissistic friends don’t have your best interests in mind. They use you for their benefit, but don’t show any gratitude for the support and help that you give them. A narcissistic friend might ask for money or favors, but then ignore you when it’s time to pay you back.
Narcissistic friends will never be satisfied with what they have — no matter how much they have, they’ll always want more. This means that they’re constantly looking for ways to increase their power, wealth, or status among their peers.
#10 – He is charming when someone first meets him but over time his personality starts to change
Narcissistic people are experts at charm and manipulation. They know what to say, when to say it, and how to make you feel like the most important person in their lives. This is why they often have a lot of friends and acquaintances.
But as time goes by, their true colors show up and they end up disappointing everyone around them because they cannot maintain any kind of relationship for longer than a few months.
When you first meet this person, he will be friendly, funny, and easy-going but after some time you will notice that he does not care about anyone but himself. He will talk about himself all the time and never ask about your interests or problems. He will always find ways to turn the conversation around so that it revolves around him alone.
#11 – He constantly compares himself to others, but especially to you
Narcissists like to compare themselves with others and will often compare themselves with people who they think are inferior to them — such as friends or family members. They may even compare their accomplishments with those of other people without realizing it or without caring if it hurts the other person’s feelings
#12 – He blames you for his fault
When things aren’t going his way, he makes sure you know that it hurts and disappoints him so much that it’s your fault. He may even blame you for not looking after him properly or for not being supportive enough of his ideas or work.
#13 – You’re less happy after spending time with him than before spending time with him, even though you’re having fun when you’re together
If you’re spending time with a narcissistic friend and you feel drained or unhappy afterward, it’s possible that your friend has a narcissistic personality and he has a way of making you feel inferior and like he’s better than you in some way.
Conclusion
Although you may have a friend in your life who displays narcissistic tendencies, this does not mean that you need to cut ties with that person. You can choose to remain friends with him or her but adjust your expectations accordingly. Of course, you should never change yourself for a friend or for anyone for that matter. Ultimately, being true to yourself will help you maintain healthy relationships, whether with friends or with romantic partners.